This Is My Eternal Punishment: Let's Play Persona 5 Royal

Put your Let's Plays in here.
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There must be some kind of way outta here

Said the joker to the thief

There’s too much confusion

I can’t get no relief

All right, people. Let’s start at the beginning one last time.

What is this?

Persona 5 Royal is the big shiny new rerelease of Persona 5 in the vein of Persona 3 FES and Persona 4 Golden. It adds several new features, including story beats, characters, gameplay systems, and much more. This LP will cover most of the new additions, if not all of them. It’ll be a grand old time.

That’s not what I meant. What is this? What are you doing? You were free!

Ah, yes. I buried the lede here, I suppose. My name is Arist, and back in 2017 I started a Let’s Play of Persona 5 that stole two years of my life lasted 21 months (28 if you count the bonus content). As that LP ended, I was practically besieged by jokes and facetious demands for me to cover Royal upon its release.

Not so funny now, is it assholes?

But that’s not the whole of it. I am… let’s say, uniquely qualified to cover the updates in Royal, given my experience with the original. And the past several months have given me a few ideas for how to show this game off, if nothing else. After all, even with all your jests, if I had no vision for this LP, I probably just wouldn’t bother.

And that vision is?

We're going to gut this overwritten sonuvabitch with a rusty knife. I'll try to show the new stuff, and keep as much context in as I can, but I'm liable to fucking go ham with the script here, because I don't see much of a point in just transcribing all these scenes again. It's for that reason that even if you don't care about spoilers I recommend you either read my original LP (located here) or play vanilla Persona 5 before reading this. In fact, you should probably read that LP even if you have played Persona 5. It’s not good, but it’ll still help.

I'm also going to do a few things to make this a little more friendly, since I'm sure many of you barely remember most of this game's scenes. First off, I'll tag each update that contains new content with (New). This probably won't actually be all that handy due to the way the new content is structured, with lots of minor additions showing up all over the place, but I figure it's worth doing anyway. The other way I'll try to keep people in the loop is by noting which update of the original LP a given scene comes from. This is not a replacement for watching/reading those scenes in the first place, because I’m still going to spoil the shit out of the original game, but they should be helpful in case you need a refresher. You may be thinking, "that sounds like an incredibly tedious waste of time, sorting through 200-plus updates looking for specific Confidant scenes," and... correct! But I'm already most likely going to be consulting my transcription of the old script religiously as I search for minor dialogue changes, so... what the hell, why not? On that note, since I fucked up the update numbering with multiple “X.5” updates in the original LP, I’ll be referencing the update numbers from the table of contents of that LP/the numbers from the text themselves, not the numbers from the LP Archive headers. The mistakes I made in that LP continue to haunt me.

I should also mention that in the case I add my own dialogue in the characters’ voices I will underline my additions. I know the LP standard is generally italics, yeah yeah, but this game has a lot of pensive inner monologue courtesy of the protagonist and italics for thoughts is more immediately recognizable in my opinion.

What’s the spoiler policy here?

Because this LP is a “sequel” to that other one, I’m probably just going to throw out all kinds of spoilers to it unmarked. This also means that you are free to discuss spoilers to vanilla Persona 5. That said, I am going to again ask that you refrain from posting or even intimating any spoilers exclusive to this version of Persona 5. Don’t make me tap the sign.

:siren: Once more, do not read this LP if you don’t want to be spoiled on the original game. :siren:

And without further ado, let’s get rolling!


Chapter 1: ???: Rewind, Replay, Remix (New)
Chapter 2: ???-4/9: Home Again Again
Chapter 3: 4/10: Mental Shutdown (New-ish)
Chapter 4: 4/10-4/11: Instant Derail
Chapter 5: 4/11: Blazing Indigo
Chapter 6: 4/11: Prison-To-School Pipeline


Chapter 7: 4/11-4/12: Rapid Fire (New)
Chapter 8: 4/12-4/13: Friends (With Benefits) (New)
Chapter 9: Side Story 1: The Trials of Sisyphus (what the fuck am I even doing)
Chapter 10: 4/14-4/15: Murder/Suicide
Chapter 11: 4/15: Expulsion Speedrun Any%, No Violence Skip
Chapter 12: 4/15-4/17: Impos(doc)tor
Chapter 13: 4/18: Word Around Town (New)
Chapter 14: 4/18-4/20: Bathroom Thoughts
Chapter 15: 4/20: Return to Castle Pervert (New)
Chapter 16: 4/20: Harvesting Seeds (New)
Chapter 17: 4/20-4/21: Prison Labor (New)
Chapter 18: 4/22: Lust For Life (New)
Chapter 19: 4/22-4/24: Clemency
Chapter 20: 4/25-4/28: Sojiro Dreams Of Coffee
Chapter 21: 4/29-5/2: Confess Your Heart Out
Chapter 22: 5/2-5/5: Buffet Troubles


Chapter 23: 5/5: A Palace Of My Very Own (New)
Chapter 24: Side Story 2: I'm Taking This Joke Too Far
Chapter 25: 5/6: Phantom Thieves Dot Zone
Chapter 26: 5/7: Return To Mementos (New)
Chapter 27: 5/8-5/9: What’s Bonkin’?
Chapter 28: 5/10-5/13: Speech Therapy (New)
Chapter 29: 5/14-5/15: The World’s Most Oblivious Stalker
Chapter 30: 5/16: Shacking Up
Chapter 31: 5/17-5/18: Yusuke Is Cancelled
Chapter 32: 5/18: Trait Of Mind (New)
Chapter 33: 5/19: Commissions Are Open
Chapter 34: 5/19-5/20: Now It’s A Party (New)
Chapter 35: 5/21-5/23: The Convict’s Diary
Chapter 36: 5/23: Priority Number One
Chapter 37: 5/23-5/24: Ryuji Needs Therapy (New)
Chapter 38: 5/25: Bonfire Of The Vanities (New)
Chapter 39: 5/25-5/26: Cat-astrophe
Chapter 40: 5/27-5/28: Operation Maidbotch
Chapter 41: 5/29-5/30: Community Service (New)
Chapter 42: 5/30-5/31: The New Mementos Adventures (New)
Chapter 43: 5/31-6/3: I’m What The Kids Are Calling “Red-Pilled” (New)
Chapter 44: 6/4-6/5: Millennials Strike Back
Chapter 45: Side Story 3: Bonus Round (why am I still doing this)


Chapter 46: 6/5: Penguin Sniper (New)
Chapter 47: 6/5-6/6: The Pointy End Goes Toward The Target (New)
Chapter 48: 6/6-6/7: McDonald’s! McDonald’s! McDonald’s! (New)
Chapter 49: 6/7-6/8: Adventures In Babysitting (New)
Chapter 50: 6/9-6/10: Return Of Pleasant Boy (New) (Kind of)
Chapter 51: 6/11: Backstory Blues
Chapter 52: 6/12: Sketchy Man Wants Protein (New)
Chapter 53: 6/13: Maaku Gets Reverse Hustled (New)
Chapter 54: 6/14-6/15: Yusuke’s Monologue (New, but not much)
Chapter 55: 6/15-6/16: Tech Bros (New)
Chapter 56: 6/17-6/18: Poor Teaching Kills
Chapter 57: 6/18: The Best They Could Do (New, but…)
Last edited by Arist on Sun Sep 19, 2021 4:34 pm, edited 59 times in total.

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Last edited by Arist on Thu Aug 20, 2020 3:47 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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Nice to see this migrating. The nasty crimeboy rides again.

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Last edited by Arist on Fri Aug 28, 2020 9:36 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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Chapter 9: Side Story 1: The Trials of Sisyphus (what the fuck am I even doing)

And we're caught up!

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So I did some digging into Kamoshida's weird voice filter. Turns out it's only for the first episode and after that, it reverts back to a filter more in line with how he sounds in the game. No idea why the first episode is the one where the filter goes into overdrive; maybe it was a test for producers for how to proceed with future episodes and they didn't like it...but then never walked it back because...????

Oh wow, I had no idea you were doing an LP of Royal. I'm doing my own Royal LP on the LP Zone, and it's funny that we both started within a little over a week of each other. Good luck with the LP!

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Last edited by Arist on Mon Oct 12, 2020 11:52 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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Last edited by Arist on Mon Oct 12, 2020 11:52 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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They put a few good new mechanics into Royal, it seems. I made myself absolutely sick of P5 (played it once on PS3 and twice on PS4) so I told myself I would not go for Royal, but now I'm wavering!

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Last edited by Arist on Mon Oct 26, 2020 8:47 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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Quick heads-up, Arist. The link to the boss fight video doesn't work.

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Should be fixed.

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